Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Breaking up with the S's.

I gave them my two-week notice today. It was horrible. Let's just say that after hanging up with Jeff this evening, it became clear that my going home for the summer is inevitable. (For the record, this is supposedly a "break" rather than a "break up," us having some time apart before I come back in the fall and we start working on the relationship again. I'll also be coming back here during the summer for the occasional weekend, so that we aren't completely separated for the summer. But whatever.)

Anyway, when the dad got home (I knew I had to do it right away, to get it over with), I sat down at the kitchen counter, trying to keep my emotions in check (I already knew that as soon as I opened my mouth, I was going to start crying again). He looked at me, and he said, "It looks like you need to tell me something." I just nodded, still unable to talk. Jokingly (or so he thought), he said, "What, are you going to quit or something?" I said, "Yeah," as my voice broke and the tears started.

Poor Mr. S. looked absolutely flabberghasted. You could tell that he truly didn't expect me to say that, and that he was throwing it out there almost rhetorically. "You ARE?" he asked with his mouth wide open.

I told him that it absolutely had nothing to do with them, that I truly loved my job with them and I adored the kids. "But I have to go home to Holland for personal reasons," I brokenly explained. "I won't be around this summer. I'm sorry."

He silently nodded. "Does my wife know?" he asked. I told him that no, I was waiting till I was absolutely sure, and that I hadn't even been absolutely sure this morning. He then asked how much time they had left, and I told him through the end of May.

Earlier, I started crying around the kids (both talking to Jeff and looking at the kids, realizing that I WAS going to have to leave them). "Are you CRYING, Supernanny?" Noah asked.

"Yeah, a little," I answered (as tears streamed down my face).

"Wow," Madison said. "I didn't know that Supernannies cried."

"Yeah, sometimes," I told her. "Even Supernannies can get sad."

"But I don't WANT you to cry," said Noah. They all looked so sad that it just broke my heart.

(The only funny part to all of this came later, as we were playing Uno and I was nervously waiting for Mr. S. to come home. Madison played a Draw 4 card and Noah looked worriedly at me. "Are you going to cry again, Supernanny?" he nervously asked.)

So that's that.

16 comments:

Renee said...

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! I'm crying now, too.

I'm really sorry it had to go down this way! :-(

keesh said...

me too. you know we are all here for you girl! . Much love for ya girl!

Nik said...

That is so incredibly sad Jen! I'm so sorry that you have to go through this. I think the bond that you have with the family is pretty strong though and that you'll keep in touch for sure. Be strong and try to keep your head up!
Love ya Beeeotch

Anna said...

That's sad.
Do you think they'll give you a reference for your next family?

Jen said...

Oh, I'm sure they will. I'm giving them plenty of notice, I said I can help to interview new nannies, I'll stay a few days longer if they need the time, etc.

Plus, they LOVE me. The mom officially offered me their spare room. She said they would really hate to see me go, and that although Mr S was initially hesitant about having a nanny, she said that seeing the routine I've brought to the kids lives', not to mention helping Noah with his letter recognition and writing--she said Mr S "thinks this nanny thing is a pretty good idea."

So anyway--yeah, when I leave, I know they'll give me a good reference for my new family. They're a lot of mutual respect and affection here. I was so lucky to find this family.

Anna said...

Why don't you take the spare room of the people who wnat you to stay and work for them in Detroit near your school? It would be better than moving back with your Mom across the state where you don't have a job, no? (I feel like that was harsh but it seems like it's just the basic reality.)

Anonymous said...

Where have I been?.... I stop reading for a few days and all hell break out. First I'm sorry to hear that you and Jeff broke up and what you are going through. It's really sad that you have to quit a job that you obviously love. What I don't understand if Jeff and you have talked about you staying there in August why don't you just stay the summer so you don't have to lose this wonderful family that you adore. Who knows what's going on between you two, but who knows maybe y'all can work through it. And just maybe with all the new changes that were taking place was putting a strain on the relationship. Jeff new job, your new job and maybe just the stress with the finances. And congrats on winning your bankruptcy case. Sorry so long I will stop preaching now.. I hope everything work out for the best...And oh yeah you don't know me...LOL Pam

Renee said...

That was weird :-)

I wondered if they'd ask you to be a live-in nanny there :-) Did you give any serious thought to it? Of course, for selfish reasons, I think it would rock for you to be in Holland for the summer, but it would make more SENSE to stay in Detroit, if possible...

Jen said...

Holy crap, you mean I have a regular reader out there who is actually following my life???

Pam, you rock! And thanks for finally commenting!

Anyway...I don't know either, Pam. Trust me, I'm still trying to figure this all out myself. In the conversations we've been having in recent days, it's become clear that there have been a lot of resentments on both sides, lots of hurt feelings--and I guess the "whirlwind" of our relationship has finally caught up with us. Everything has moved sooo fast and there's been drama of some kind the whole time. We just need to take a breather I guess.

And Anna, there are two reasons, I guess: 1) I need to make a clean break for right now. Just being in basically the same neighborhood as Jeff would make me too sad, knowing he's that close by but we're still so separated. (That was deep.) There are two many memories around here that I just need to get away from to give me that distance and perspective.

Secondly, no matter how much I love them, they're still my employers. Have you ever tried to live with a boss? Go move in with Melissa for a while and tell me how that works out. =-) You don't have "work time" and "you time" anymore. It all gets blurred together. I love the kids, but do I want to be with them 24-7? Not exactly.

Renee said...

Good points, Jen. You'd turn into psycho stalker, driving by the apartment and his work and stuff to get a peek at him ;-)

Jen said...

"Turn into"?

Renee said...

Hehehehe. Yeah...

Anna said...

So wehat did the S's say when you told them you weren't leaving?

Renee said...

Yeah, that's my question of the day, too!

Jen said...

"Good."

Sorry I don't have anything more exciting for ya. But it was the morning and she was getting ready to leave for work.

Anna said...

Huh, good. Well, that's good then.