Tuesday, May 31, 2005
According to my VERY REALIABLE SOUCES, there's some good American Idol drama going on.
1) Bo's girlfriend from back home is pregnant with his child. HOWEVER,
2) He also has/had a thing going on with Carrie, BUT
3) SHE had a little sumpin' sumpin' going on with Anthony before he left the show. (Which Renee, Kishelle and I already deduced.)
Should make for an interesting tour.
Monday, May 30, 2005
So I busted out the sunless tanning lotion last night.
If you know me at all, you can imagine the results.
My arms actually aren't too bad (and it is a natural color), but it's streaky/patchy near the wrists and hands and stuff. And my legs...good Lord. Once it dried, I noticed some parts that I had missed, so I tried to go back over it today to even out the streaks...Then but now I'm one shade darker and just as streaky.
I'm not sure WHY I thought this would be a remotely successful venture.
Sunday, May 29, 2005
I'll be updating my resume today for a summer job I plan to apply for: a counselor at a camp for individuals with physical disabilities. Although I have some reservations (let's face it: I'm not exactly the poster girl for physical fitness; while I don't know the exact requirements of the position, I'm pretty sure that I could barely get MYSELF through a ropes course, let alone an adult male in a wheelchair--and yes, there actually is a modified, handicapped-accessible ropes course), this job would also be beneficial in a number of ways.
- The position includes room and board, so I would have a place to stay for the summer that doesn't involve my mother and I living under the same roof for 8 weeks.
- It would provide me with great fodder for my resume (not the most altruistic reason, perhaps, but still a motivating factor).
- One would think that, with all the physical exertion, outdoor activities and (I assume) relatively healthy food, I could actually get myself into shape.
And, most importantly:
- I can spend my Summer of Angst and Heartbreak (good thing that I'm not too dramatic or anything) doing something worthwhile and meaningful. Spending time with those who are physically challenged should help to put my own "problems" into perspective for me; really, all things considered, I'm still pretty damn lucky.
For more information on the camp, go here:
Saturday, May 28, 2005
I just noticed a nest in the tree closest to our balcony railing--and in that nest are 4 beautiful blue robin eggs. (You can look RIGHT into the nest from our balcony--pretty cool.) I don't know how long the eggs have been there, but incubation is 12 - 14 days. I wonder if they'll hatch while I'm still here.
Trivia fact number one: robins usually lay four eggs at a time--an egg a day.
Trivia fact number two: baby robins will stay in the nest for 9-16 days.
Trvia fact number three: only 40% of "clutches"--which is like a "litter" of puppies, only for robins--actually survive to leave the nest. Guess I shouldn't get too attached to them then.
I'll continue to update you for as long as I'm around. Remember: today is just the first day that I NOTICED the eggs. They may have been there for a while; they could hatch tomorrow or two weeks from now.
I'm sure I can turn this into an educational activity for "my kids" somehow. I think I'll get a disposable camera and start taking daily pictures, from now until (hopefully) the babies are full grown and leave the nest. Then I can show the pictures to the kids and we can put together a "baby book" for the birds, writing a little story to go with the pictures. They're really too young to be able to do anything much more advanced. Two of the three kids don't even have a concept of time yet, so my telling them that the "eggs will hatch in another week" or "the baby birds will leave the next in two more weeks" won't mean anything to them. (Noah, the 4 year old, once said, "Supernanny, remember when we went out for ice cream last year?"--referring to something we had done the week before.)
Thursday, May 26, 2005
I got an IM today from one of my adopted boys in Iraq--one I've been writing to since February but haven't heard from till today. I have to say, I got a little teary-eyed when I realized it was him. It's so great to "talk" to him and know he's okay. And get this--he's from Michigan, less than 2 hours away! He'll be home on leave in August and wants to take me out to dinner. He's such a wonderful guy!
Yesterday was the last day of my pre-student teaching placement, and I actually got to teach stuff. I received great feedback from Mrs. R and she gave me a glowing review to submit to my advisor, and the kids seemed to be pretty into the lesson. (Although one boy clearly missed the point of the lesson; after discussing Buddha and his values and beliefs, one boy wrote an essay speculating that, if Buddha were alive today, he'd "be in a gang or something.") Plus, I got to break up one almost-fight (no small feat, considering that both boys were bigger than I was).
Gotta love middle school.
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
Yeah, Jeff and I are breaking up. I put my notice in at work; I'll be out of here in the next couple of weeks. For the summer, anyway. And after that, who knows. I have to find a way to still pull off this student teaching thing.
I may not post quite as much for a while, because honestly, I'm hurtin' pretty bad. And I don't want this blog to get all depressing and drama-filled and shit. So you all do your thing and I'll chime in when I can.
You all know that when I'm going through a hard time, I may pull away a little, disappear for a while, etc. You ALSO know that I'll find you all when I DO need to talk.
This one hurts, you guys.
On the way home from picking up Noah from preschool, Luc announced that he had to go potty.
"Well," I said. "We're not home yet, so I guess we've got a problem."
"Maybe you should call Action News," Noah suddenly said.
"WHAT?" I asked.
He just shrugged and said, "I don't know, my mommy and daddy watch Action News every night, and they always say that if you have a problem, you should call Action News."
Monday, May 23, 2005
Sunday, May 22, 2005
Looks like SOMEONE may have to move out of state for a couple of years. Then again, I've been hearing that former graduates of my program have a slight advantage over "traditional" graduates, since we already have a few years of life and work experience under our belts. We can bring things to the table (in my case, my brief career in PR/advertising/marketing) that those who are right of college can't. Plus, I've already gained a couple of extra years working full-time with kids (parapro, nanny, etc), as opposed to the typical college "senior."
I just hope that, by the this time next year, the teaching job market in Michigan is looking a little better....
Friday, May 20, 2005
Yes, my boss got me drunk tonight. She had some friends over after work. I stayed a little late-- helping her set up, running to the store, etc. Once I got back, she kept giving me drinks...and I kept taking them. I was kind of working, kind of hanging out. I'd keep excusing myself to go check on the kids. Basically, it was ovetime paid for in free alcohol.
I was "under the influence" by 8 (more than buzzed, not quite drunk--although that seemed to hit once I got home).
And, I'm very sorry to say, I bought a pack of cigarettes. You guys, I never stood a chance. 1) I forgot to put my patch on this morning 2) I was drinking and C) Other people were smoking. If you put me around other smokers and alcohol--without my patch to back me up--you know that I'm screwed.
Okay, I'm starting to come down and I'm tired. Good night.
Would it disturb you much if, upon your death, your body were simply thrown into the woods and left to rot? Why?
Pisces - Your Love Profile
Your positive traits: You're very tuned into your lover's feelings - and always doing something caring.Sweetness - you're the most romantic person your parnter has ever met.You get easily swept away and are a total delight to fall in love with.
Your negative traits: You are super duper sensitive and find it hard to get out of a sad mood.It's difficult for you to tell your sweetie no, even when you should.You often tell your partner what they want to hear, instead of being honest.
Your ideal partner: Is straight from a fairy tale - the man or woman of your dreamsIs a total romantic, with an artistic or creative sideLoves to express their love to you, in all sorts of unique ways
Your style: Dreamy. You like traditional romantic dates, like picnics in the park and candlelight dinners.
Your seduction style: Fearless - you try what your parnter suggests, no matter how unusual.Loving. You'll take your pleasure second, if necessary.Internal. A lot of your enjoyment takes place within your head.
Tips for the future: Be more realistic. Your romantic ideal is nice, but it may just not happen.Let go of your fear of rejection - it's holding you back from being with your true love.Open yourself up to a new love. The person you think you want make not be the one..
Thursday, May 19, 2005
Your positive traits:
Get your free love profile at Blogthings.
The boys and I saw a dog maul a duck at the park this morning--not exactly "Sesame Street" material. The dog's owner (who was a real asshole) didn't seem too concerned; he just called his dog back over to him, muttered "It'll be fine" to the boys and me and walked away. I slowly approached the duck, who was alive but not moving, and saw that its legs were pretty much useless (I don't know if they were broken or what, but the duck was struggling, unsuccessfully, to stand up). Now, if you know me AT ALL, you know that even the mere HINT of animal suffering usually drives me to tears. However, since the boys were already a bit upset themselves, I had to stay relatively calm for them (as opposed to breaking into huge, gulping sobs while running after that guy and kicking him in the balls for not having his dog under control/on a leash--AND for just walking away without a care in the world).
Anyway, I brokenheartedly (no exaggeration; I absolutely hated to leave this duck all alone and hurt) headed for home, where I emailed a few different departments at the park. Shortly afterwards, I received an email from the park director, who assured me that a staff member would try to find the duck and bring him to the on-site petting zoo for treatment (the zoo wasn't yet open while we were there, or you KNOW that I would have fashioned a leg splint out of a stick and some weeds and brought the damn duck over there myself. As it was, I seriously considered loading the duck into my car and driving around until I found a vet, but then I didn't know if they'd expect me to pay for it; plus, I wasn't sure that the S's would be thrilled about their kids sharing the backseat with injured wildlife).
I may be a sarcastic, bitter and cynical smartass, but I'll be damned if I don't have a soft spot for animals (Anna, were you around when I kept a baby mouse found in the DMX office building as my "pet"?).
Wednesday, May 18, 2005
Anna and I went undercover last night as secret shoppers for steakfood chain restaurant. We went there as "first time visitors" (for Anna, she didn't even have to pretend) and secretly rated them on service, food, etc. I think we were pretty smooth about it, except when we accidentally ran out on the bill at the end and got chased down by our waitor (I had unthinkingly put the signed credit card receipt in my purse, along with the other copies). So THAT kind of impeded our attempt to blend in and not draw attention to ourselves. But other than that, it was an evening of great (virtually free) food and even better conversation.
Oh, and one other thing--and as of tonight, I'm 72 hours smoke-free. It's been a couple of months since I've made it this long.
So describes my reaction to the debut of Brittany and Kevin's reality show last night. I wasn't going to watch it until BFF mentioned it--at which point I felt almost obligated to swtich it on, as well (I care about my friends too much to make them watch sucky reality shows on their own). We reconvened at commericials to discuss the trainwreck that was "Chaotic." If you missed out on the big premiere--well, words just don't do it justice. I will, however, say this: for a good 6-minutes of the hour-long episode, we watched Brittany waiting for Kevin to get out of the shower. Having said that, I kept watching it long after the banality and self-absorbtion had felled my partner in crime--and sadly, I'm pretty sure I'll be watching in the upcoming weeks, too. At this point, I just want to see how much worse it can possibly get.
On the plus side, Bo ROCKED on American Idol. Who here didn't get chills when he chose to sing his second song a'capella? It was just Bo on a darkened stage, illuminated only by a single spotlight--and, of course, the Internal Glow of Hotness that just radiates off of him. (Seriously, he just gets sexier every week.)
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
I received a request to post another question from my Book of Questions. I'll pick a more interesting topic this time :-)
If you were going to turn to crime to support yourself from now on, what kind of criminal would you become?
Monday, May 16, 2005
As Kishelle and Fred have already discovered, Nikki has a blog. I don't know WHY she hasn't mentioned it (or maybe she did and I just missed it in the Drama That Was Last Week), but here it is. (There's a really good entry about her interview for a correctional officer position--something ELSE I didn't know about Nikki....wait. Nicole IS your real name, right?)
I was at Bath and Body Works over the weekend (DID NOT buy anything, thank you very much), and I tested some sunless tanning lotion on a (visible) portion of my arm.
Let me say that again, to make sure you got it. Part of my arm, from including my inner elbow and upper forearm, is covered in self-tanning lotion. The rest of my arm--hell, the rest of my BODY--is not.
Are you getting a visual yet?
I had to go out to buy some self-tanning lotion today (mind you, not the same kind that was actually tested on my arm; I didn't want to spend that much on such a little bottle--plus, I don't like the orange-y results I got), because my arm looks so freakish that I'm scaring the children. I'll update you on the application (and, of course, the results) later tonight.
Friday, May 13, 2005
We had some thunderstorms briefly roll through the area earlier today. I could tell the boys were a little scared (the thunder was really loud), so I resorted to the Thunder Story that my mother used to tell us when WE were little.
"Don't worry, guys," I said. "Thunder just means that God is bowling and he got a strike."
Noah looked at me like I was an idiot.
"No, Supernanny," this FOUR YEAR OLD explained to me. "Thunder is when hot air and cold air--" and he brought his hands together in a loud clap--"meet."
Tim plays softball and I usually go to sit in the stands as a softball wife. I didn’t go this week but when he came home I was sorry I’d missed it.
He walked into the house at 11:30 with a Big Ol’ Black Eye! I squealed about it, got him ibuprofen and ice and then asked “So this must’ve happened late in the last game, huh?” He said no, not quite, and proceeded to tell me the story of how he was accidentally hit in the cheek during warm up but wanted to stay and play. After the Ambulance EMTs declared him OK he went out to play. He hit 3 home runs in a row and played like a madman.
He’s all proud of himself and says that anyone who quits after they’re hurt is a pansy. I think anyone hit in the head with something that earns attention from an Ambulance should take it easy for the night. Is this a gender difference or a no brainer?
- Lemon Pez taste like Lemon Pledge.
- Kids will say ANYTHING that pops into their minds. We were at Wendy's for lunch today, and a teenage boy with a spiked Mohawk walked in. Unfortunately, he sat down at a table right next to us (Luc was watching him with fascination, and I knew that we were in trouble).
"Supernanny!" he said. "Why does that boy have tall hair?"
A lady sitting nearby kind of choked on her drink.
"And why is it so pointy? It looks like the sun." (He was referring to the "rays" of the sun, I assume, because his hair wasn't orange or yellow or something.)
I'm mortified, of course. "Luc," I hissed. "We'll talk about it in the car. But right now, please don't say anything or you might hurt his feelings."
We had a really close call at the supermarket earlier this week, too. We turned into an aisle and saw an extremely large man standing there.
"Supernanny!!" Luc said. (Oh God no, I was thinking.) "That man is REALLY --"
GOD NO SHUT UP.
I've already sent a lot of you an email about this, but the Battle of the Js has finally reached a compromise. Instead of my moving home for the summer, quitting my job and driving both my mother and myself crazy, I'm going to stay here but go home on the weekends. That way, we're still together while also getting some regular time apart.
I'm really excited, and we're both optimisic about moving forward.
It's been a hellish week, and I thank you all, from the bottom of my heart, for being there for me. Not only has my appreciation and gratitude for "my girls" (and Rob and Fred) ;) been strengthened, but all of this has gotten Jeff and I REALLY talking about a lot of issues that have been buried for too long.
And now I can't wait to go to work tomorrow and tell the S's that I get to stay.
Thank you again, everyone.
(Hey--I TOLD you that this blog would never be boring.)
Thursday, May 12, 2005
1) Last night, I found the toothpaste in the fridge.
2) This morning, I put on my shoes, looked down--and realized that I had forgotten the "pants" portion of the dressing process.
3) Preparing dinner for the kids a few minutes ago, I was provided with a dazzling reminder of why you don't put tin foil in the microwave.
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
I gave them my two-week notice today. It was horrible. Let's just say that after hanging up with Jeff this evening, it became clear that my going home for the summer is inevitable. (For the record, this is supposedly a "break" rather than a "break up," us having some time apart before I come back in the fall and we start working on the relationship again. I'll also be coming back here during the summer for the occasional weekend, so that we aren't completely separated for the summer. But whatever.)
Anyway, when the dad got home (I knew I had to do it right away, to get it over with), I sat down at the kitchen counter, trying to keep my emotions in check (I already knew that as soon as I opened my mouth, I was going to start crying again). He looked at me, and he said, "It looks like you need to tell me something." I just nodded, still unable to talk. Jokingly (or so he thought), he said, "What, are you going to quit or something?" I said, "Yeah," as my voice broke and the tears started.
Poor Mr. S. looked absolutely flabberghasted. You could tell that he truly didn't expect me to say that, and that he was throwing it out there almost rhetorically. "You ARE?" he asked with his mouth wide open.
I told him that it absolutely had nothing to do with them, that I truly loved my job with them and I adored the kids. "But I have to go home to Holland for personal reasons," I brokenly explained. "I won't be around this summer. I'm sorry."
He silently nodded. "Does my wife know?" he asked. I told him that no, I was waiting till I was absolutely sure, and that I hadn't even been absolutely sure this morning. He then asked how much time they had left, and I told him through the end of May.
Earlier, I started crying around the kids (both talking to Jeff and looking at the kids, realizing that I WAS going to have to leave them). "Are you CRYING, Supernanny?" Noah asked.
"Yeah, a little," I answered (as tears streamed down my face).
"Wow," Madison said. "I didn't know that Supernannies cried."
"Yeah, sometimes," I told her. "Even Supernannies can get sad."
"But I don't WANT you to cry," said Noah. They all looked so sad that it just broke my heart.
(The only funny part to all of this came later, as we were playing Uno and I was nervously waiting for Mr. S. to come home. Madison played a Draw 4 card and Noah looked worriedly at me. "Are you going to cry again, Supernanny?" he nervously asked.)
So that's that.
If you were helping to raise money for a charity and someone agreed to make a large contribution if you would perform at the upcoming fund-raising show, would you? If so, what would you like to perform? Assume the show would have an audience of about 1,000.
Tuesday, May 10, 2005
Tim and I went out looking for tile for our new bathroom last weekend.
Background info: We had gone out looking for tile once before for an entire afternoon, hitting about 4 stores with no luck.
0300: Arrive at Tile Store
0320: Choose linoleum tile
0325: Decide we need to check out ceramic tiles
0400: Choose ceramic tile
0410: Realize we’ve chosen Wall Tile (Who the hell is putting tiles on their walls?!)
0420: We find the matching floor tile
0425: It doesn’t come in the right size
0430: We start over Again
0445: I lose all semblance of patience and am desperate to make a decision because I never want to do this again As Long As I Live. I tell Tim I don’t care what we get, that anything is fine. Tim says, no, it’s more important than that and if I’m going to be that way about it we won’t get anything. (I can’t win!)
0455: We’re asked by the sales guy if we have a decision as the Store is Closing
0456: Tim says, unfortunately no
0500: I storm out of the store never to return
To Date: We remain tile-less
I don't know if any of you have noticed, but if you scroll all the down to the bottom of main blog page, you'll see a button that says "Site Meter." Click on that, and a wealth of information is revealed. It tells you how many people have visited my blog (since I began tracking it on May 1, that is) and how many times my blog has been viewed all together (at least, I THINK that's the difference between "visits" and "page views." For example, no matter how much Kishelle visits, she's only counted once as a visitor--but every time she checks the blog again, that counts as a "page view" (if I'm wrong, please correct me). Also cool: in the upper left hand side, you'll see "Who's On?" Click on that, and you'll be able to see how many people (including yourself) are on my page at that very moment--and how long they've been there.
As I write this, I'm about to hit my 500th visitor (and that's in just 10 days!). Now I realize that, for most sites, that's not exactly something to brag about-- but for my little blog, I'm pretty exited. By the end of the month, I could have 1000!! (Again, I know that some sites get like 1000 a day--but please just let me revel in my own kind of fame.)
Per Eric, a visit is each time one of you comes to my blog (so it's not necessary 500 people; just people have come 500 times). Page views is how many different pages you viewed (duh) while you were here.
Monday, May 09, 2005
Renee and Anna commented on the "sadness" of "Broken Road" as my new blog title. Believe it or not, I actually intended for it to have positive, optimistic connotations. There's a country song by Rascal Flatts called "Bless the Broken Road;" it talks about how enduring the sad, the heartbreaking and the unexpected are all part of bringing you to where you're someday meant to be. The song is primarily about the search for that special someone; and although I obviously do hope that there's someone out there waiting for me, I also take it as hope and inspiration for EVERYTHING my future holds.
I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
Sunday, May 08, 2005
(Yeah, my thoughts don't jump around too much or anything.)
Anyway, I found a truly insightful and fascinating link at Fred's World (FYI, he also had a career change to teaching) that I wanted to post over here. It helps you figure whether you're liberal or conservative (if you give a damn). On a scale of 0 to 40, I scored a 19--almost smack dab in the middle, with a slight lean towards the liberal side. According to the post-test comparisons, I'm closest to Colin Powell in my political beliefs. Hmmm.
By now, you guys know that Jeff and I are, at the moment, no longer together. It seems like it's going to "stick" this time, at least for a while. It especially sucks that it happened over Mother's Day weekend, which, as you know, is a really hard time for me anyway.
It's always sad when a relationship ends, especially this one. And thinking about starting over again at 28, especially when I, at one p0int, was sure that I had found The One, is scary and defeating and overwhelming.
There are lots of details to work out, obviously. He said that I can still stay here for student teaching in the fall (I'll be done by Thanksgiving), but that still leaves the summer. I offered to go home for the summer and come back for school in the fall (though I haven't discussed that with Mom yet, LOL), but that would mean leaving my nannying job with the S.'s, which would suck.
Anyway, I wanted to post it here so that I could have "my girls" around me (and anyone else who happens to stumble across this blog).
Breaking up is, as they say, hard to do. Especially in this case. Even if it IS for the best (and frankly, I still don't know how I feel about it. It hasn't totally hit me yet, I guess).
And, the anniversary of "the accident" is at the end of the month...along with what would have been Jeff and my's anniversary.
Can we just skip May?
Saturday, May 07, 2005
For those of you who haven't been over there recently, I suggest that you take a quick detour back over to Rob's blog. Out of the dozens of songs he has sent me in the course of our new friendship (we've GOTTA be up to "dozens" by now, right?), there was one that I truly, truly loved: Ryan Montbleau's "Just Perfect." And you can hear it right now at http://stateofrob.blogspot.com/ . Then come back and tell me what you think.
(But don't heap TOO much praise on his musical tastes; we had to go through a lot of songs before achieving success with this one. A LOT.)
Thursday, May 05, 2005
I'm having a Pollyanna moment and, instead of being cynical and pessimistic, I suddenly feel like looking on the bright side of things. This is just a partial list but I felt compelled to share. Feel free to add your own. (Please note that these are my favorite "things," which is why I left off obvious things like friends, family, Jeff, blah blah blah.)
- Sleeping in.
- Peanut butter and chocolate anything.
- Seeing someone who passed me on the freeway pulled over on the side of the road a few miles later. (Trust me--if you're going faster than me, then you DESERVE to be pulled over.)
- "Bridge Over Troubled Water."
- 80s music.
- Shopping for soldier care packages.
- Being able to do a hell of a roundhouse kick (thank you, Billy Blanks).
- The #12 car. (Hell, NASCAR in general.)
Monday, May 02, 2005
Right now, I keep bursting into song with "Mickey" ("Hey Mickey, you're so fine, you're so fine you blow my mind. Hey Mickey! Hey Mickey!") and the Coke with Lime song ("Put the lime in the coconut, drink it all up"--actually, that one I've taught to the kids, so that we can all be in Jingle Hell together).
Sunday, May 01, 2005
As I (a white female) was leaving my apartment building today, two other residents (a black female and an Arab-American man) were coming in. It just struck me as kind of cool.
Then, at the gas station, my two favorite clerks (both Middle Eastern) were working. I shall call them Funny One and Quiet One. At this Mobile, they have the card reader on the counter so that those using credit and debit cards can run them through themselves. As I never use cash anymore (not even at fast food places, since they geniously began accepting debit cards as well), I use this card reader almost every day. And every day, I need to run my card through at least half a dozen times before it "takes"--probably because I like to run my card through with a flourish. (Last night, Funny One told me to "try it again, a little less enthusiastically this time.")
Tonight, I was extra "special" and was on about my tenth attempt before it went through. ("You're in here EVERY DAY," said Funny One. "How have you not mastered this machine yet?") But the best part came when Quiet One asked me if I wanted my receipt.
"That's not a receipt," Funny One remarked. "For her, it's a Certificate of Achievement."
I left the gas station laughing hysterically.