Prepare for your productivity to come to a screeching halt
Some of my favorites in just the first few minutes of surfing:
(603): Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
(1-603) Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
(405): I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
(913): very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
(206): Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad