Thursday, March 19, 2009

Roller action

I've been doing a lot of research into the whole roller derby thing. Here's what I've found out thus far:

1) Practice times for the Ft. Myers Derby Girls ARE at a normal time: 9-11 pm on Wednesday nights (that part does sort of suck but it's only once a week) and 11 am - 1 pm on Sundays.

2) I now know how the sport is played, which is definite progress. =-) There are 2 main positions, blockers and jammers. There's also something called pivots, but I'm still a little uncertain as to what they do. Anyway, there are four blockers on each team; they start skating first, and then the jammers (1 for each team) take off. Points are scored when a jammer passes a skater from the opposing team. Blockers, of course, try to block the other team's jammer from getting through, while also trying to clear the way for their own jammer. So...yeah. It's kind of like a football/NASCAR hybrid--on skates.

3) The fact that I'm a beginner skater isn't anywhere as near a hindrance as one might think, LOL. The skater I've been talking to on myspace says that when she first started about a year ago, she was happy if she could stand up on skates without falling over. Even I'M not that bad--I can relatively confidently go around the rink, albeit at a slow and steady pace. So anyway, with practicing twice a week (maybe even more), I could potentially get pretty good, pretty quickly--especially with them teaching me.

So anyway, I'm going to my first practice this Sunday--not so much to actually PRACTICE, but to talk to the skaters, watch them in action and decide if this is really something I want to do. Should be good times.


Randy said...

I totally DIG roller derby. You need a gimmick too, don't you?

I wish you luck, it sounds awesome....of course you'll have to supply pics if and when you get out there!!

anna said...

Do you use old fashioned, 4 wheel skates or roller blades?

Renee said...

And have you found out if they'll let you use your super cool Britney Spears skates?

LOL. This sounds really fun, and I can't wait to hear more about it!

Jen said...

Randy: do you mean like the "alter ego," or skater name? Cuz yes, they do. My name will either be "Stacked Attack" (cuz of my boobs) or, if my guy friends have their way, "Gang Bang" (which truly has nothing to do with me as a person but they just love the name and they say it "fits" my personality---I'm not sure how to take that, LOL

And yes, Anna, it's the 4 wheel (quad) skates--and my Britney skates will work for now, but if I really do this, I'll have to eventually get the speed ones

anna said...

How did it go? Are you still alive?

Anonymous said...

I really don't think you should do this.

Nik said...

So, how'd it go? I still can't believe you're doing this. Remember when they used to have this on tv? Think you could film this shit for us? Yeah, right Gang Bang has absolutely nothing to do w/ you as a person. Suuuuure! lmao I kinda like Gang Bang, but Stacked Attack is badass too.

Renee said...

LOLOLOL. Yeah, I have NO CLUE why they think that's a good name for you... hmmmm. Strange, isn't it?

LMAO. I like Stacked Attack best, but you can't really go wrong with Gang Bang, either :-)

Can't wait to hear how last night went. I know you said you weren't really going to do much "practice"; just getting to know the girls, but it's still exciting :-)

Oh, and when I told John about you going last night, he wanted to make a bet with me that at least one of the girls would try to get with you. And that you'd accept. LOLOLOLOL. So, yeah. Let us know how it went ;-)

Jen said...

IT WAS CANCELLED!! They had an away bout (game), so they didn't have enough girls left for practice. Damn. I'll try again on Wed.

(I'm ignoring all the other comments. bitches.)

Jen said...

LOL. I sent the following email to the local skate shop in town, which is where hte girls suggested I go for my pads (much better quality than, say, a sporting goods store--those pads are fine for regular roller blading but not for what THEY do, and like they said, it's better to spend $30 more on pads now than to have medical bills, broken bones and therapy later). Anyway, apparently (based on the response I just got) they found it rather entertaining: =-)

"Hey guys,

I'm probably going to become one of the Ft Myers Derby Girls, and they suggested I hit your place up for my protective gear. I just wondered what kind of suggestions you have for me and general price ranges, because I AM, after all, a teacher. I'm going to need some good pads though, because I plan on falling a lot (no, seriously. I don't think you understand. A LOT.). I'm especially worried about the elbows because I broke my right elbow about a year ago walking down the hallway at school, so I need to keep those especially safe. Then again, the girl who broke an elbow walking down a HALLWAY should probably be worried about protecting pretty much everything, eh? I also need a helmet (which, based on the above, probably goes without saying. In fact, I should probably be wearing one every day). Oooh, and do you have those shorts with the padded asses 'cuz mine is quite bony and I need to protect that too. (I might actually just wear those all the time to get that J-Lo effect.) Okay, thanks for your help."

lotusblossom said...

can't breath...laugh to hard.
may die

Renee said...

OMG, I'm DYING over here! ROTFLMFAO. Helloo, what was their response?

LOLOLOLOLOL. You are so fucking funny

anna said...


Yeah, what did they say back?