So THIS is what a broken heart feels like....oh, wait, no, that's just bronchitis

This is another post that began as a reply to a comment, but I figured it was entertaining enough that it deserved it's own spot.

This thing with Dave was actually, for a few days there, a whole new level of pain for me. In fact, I actually went for two FULL days without eating. (And for ME, that's saying a lot.) =-) It was shaping up to be my most painful breakup ever (other than Cam, but what with the whole coma thing and all, that had a whole different set of issues). Anyway, it was weird, considering we were together for such a short period of time, but there was just something ABOUT him...plus, it's amazing how close you can get when you actually LET someone in and not push them away all the time.

HOWEVER, I'm glad to report that after a phone call last night (he called ME, thank you very much--mostly because, due to my lack of willpower, I deleted his number from my phone) and several emails, it sounds like this might just be a temporary thing rather than permanent...which makes me incredibly happy. He has some things to wrap up with his ex and the house in the next couple of weeks, plus a HUGE certification test at work, and he got to the point where he wanted to take a deep breath, slow down and fully resolve the issues of his OLD relationship before he could truly devote himself to his NEW one. However, I can confidently say that his love for me isn't, and never was, the problem. He's such a great guy.

On a rather humorous note (another one to file in the "Only Jen" category), I've had a hard time breathing since all of this went down--my chest has felt heavy, breathing was actually difficult and labored and I had a general pain in my chest. I wrote it off to, literally, a "broken heart" ("Wow," I thought, "Dave must REALLY be the one! I've never broken up with someone and been PHYSICALLY UNABLE to breathe!")...and then I realized, oh my God, I've been having an asthma attack for like 2 days! I was just so distracted with everything else, and it started at almost the same time that we broke up, so I just thought the "heaviness in my heart" was losing Dave. LOL. I'm such a 'tard.

I finally went to the doc after work yesterday (running down the hall to break up a fight yesterday afternoon literally depleted all of my remaining oxygen reserves and I could tell that I was in trouble) and walked out with--are you ready?--TEN different meds. They gave me breathing treatments, my pulse was REALLY high, my pulse-ox was down--they actually wanted to admit me to the hospital but I'm out of sick time so I told them I'd be fine if they loaded me up. Before I left, I got a steroid shot, more steroids to take home, about 5 different inhalors, etc....oh, and top of that, I have freakin' BRONCHITIS, too (which is disease #7 or something like that for March).

No wonder I felt so miserable the last few days. =-)

I'm a dork.