Monday, July 13, 2009

Oops, I did it again

Okay, so NO BIG DEAL AT ALL, MOM, but I might be back in a sling again (and by "might," I mean, "I am"). LOL. My crazy doc put me back on lithium, which can fuck with your balance....yadda yadda yadda, I fell on my right arm over the weekend. I finally went in to the doctor today, and I have a SLIGHT, VERY SLIGHT, MOTHER, fracture to my right elbow, and the only reason he's worried is because it's the one I broke a year ago. He gave me the sling just to MAKE SURE it doesn't get any worse, but as you may remember from last year, I barely wore the damn thing even when my elbow was outright broken, so I can't imagine I'll be wearing it very much now. ;) However, as of tonight (Monday), it does hurt like a bitch, so I'll wear it the next couple of days, and I'm SURE I'll be fine--like I said, he wouldn't even have worried about it that much if I didn't have a "history" with this elbow, and he said that because I broke it I'll always be more "susceptible" (ooh, big word) to injury in this area, and he did say to expect some "discomfort" when I fly home on Wednesday (because one thing I did notice, even after I had healed this winter, was that the altitude hurt my elbow like a mofo), and he ALSO picked up on the "arthritis" in my elbow (thanks, bitch, cuz I need ANOTHER reminder of how old I am)....this is a really long sentence, LOL. Anyway, I'm fine. I just have a sling again for when I need it over the next couple of weeks.

BECAUSE I'M OLD AND MY BONES ARE MORE FRAGILE.

Mother fucker, I'm going to need one of those "I've fallen and I can't get up" things pretty soon.

Fuck.

7 comments:

Jen said...

PS,no pain pills, he said ibuprofin would be fine, so no "vicodin is da bomb, yo" posts out of this one. Dammit. ;) LOL

Jen said...

PPS my condition led me to reread my prevous 'broken eblow' posts and i was in hysterics reading about the "soft scrub with bleach" misunderstanding. LOL. if you dont remember, click on the "broken elbow" label under this post and you'll see what i mean (it's under the comments section of "more things I suck at doing left handed")

Renee said...

Hahahahahahahahahaha! I'm sorry. It's not funny, funny, but YOU are funny. Your post is hilarious. You're gonna look fly as hell in your sling and bucket helmet :-)

I'm tellin you. Either start drinking milk or taking calcium supplements. I'm not kidding. Osteoporosis is not a pretty thing.

Jen said...

I got this email from Mom and I had to post it because it was so funny.

"WEAR THE DAMN SLING THIS TIME, EVEN WHEN IT FEELS BETTER! IT HAS TO HEAL, NIMROD. AND IT WILL NOT HEAL WITHOUT THE SLING. DON'T PISS ME OFF ABOUT THIS. AND DON'T BE A STUBBORN YOU KNOW WHAT."

Did my mother seriously just call me a "nimrod"? LOL

Renee said...

hahahaha! She can call you a nimrod, but then feels the need to edit the "you know what"?

Jen said...

LOL.

Well, I learned the hard way today that I NEED to be careful with my elbow, cuz I was too overzealous today and now it hurts and stuff.

The good news is, I'll be home tomorrow, at which time Mom can park herself firmly on MY ASS and stay on it for the next 2 weeks, LOL.

Kishelle said...

I will bust you out of there in 2 sleeps as My son says :). Is this your way of getting out of helping me drive if i have a nervous breakdown?? :)...