Monday, January 21, 2008

Crazy No Mo'

I'm just kidding. I'm still crazy as a fox, of course. HOWEVER, having reached 6 months of "sanity" (I should get a pin, like in AA), I have been deemed well enough by my doctor to be seen only every 3 months, instead of monthly. I was so excited to be "promoted," as I called it, that I tried out a joke on her. "Wow, I sure have you fooled, eh?" I said. She glared at me over her bifocal lenses.

Okay, still too soon for the crazy jokes. Duly noted.

Even so: six months is the longest I've gone without an episode in--well, EVER, I would guess. I'm damn near normal, even. So why is my love life still a mess? (Had two promising dates with a new guy; haven't heard from him in 2 days. Not sure if I should be panicking yet.)

13 comments:

Renee said...

LOLOLOL. Congratulations on your "promotion" :-) That is fantastic and I'm super happy for you! The love life will come... especially if you heed John's words of wisdom. LOL. The ones from my earlier email AND the ones he offered on the phone while you were still in Holland ;-)

Anna said...

It's great to hear that the meds and awareness are working!

Nik said...

Yea- congrats on the promotion to "Not so crazy". It's great that you are doing so well with everything.

As far as the love life, I've said it before and I'll keep saying it, you're looking too much for it. Just live life and let things be what they are. You're going to meet "Him" when you least expect too. I think you might focus a bit too much on this, but that's just my opinion. I hope you don't think I'm being mean, just telling you what I see.

Anna said...

I think Nik's right. I didn't find Tim until I had given up on a relationship and just wanted to have fun. It just grew from there.

Renee, What are John's words of wisdom?

Renee said...

Shit, my comment didn't post. The story behind John's words of wisdom: Jen's flight home from MI to FL was jacked up and she couldn't get it fixed at Deb's because of their dial-up connection, so she called me to help her with a cool people's internet :-) My words, not hers. Anyway, John answered the phone and she told him she was having a dilemma of biblical proportions. That's all he needed to hear before advising her to "shave it all off". He claims that can solve almost all problems :-)

John and I also met while neither of us were lookin for love. John had just moved from Lansing to Grand Rapids and told people he was dating someone in Lansing, which he wasn't.

I had been dating a guy for a little over a year and while we never talked ABOUT getting married, Shawn talked about the future like it was a given that we'd be married with kids some day, with sentences beginning like "when we're married..." or saying stuff about our non-existent kids :-)

So I definitely wasn't looking, and honestly THOUGHT I was quite happy. But the first time I saw John, something happened in my belly. I don't even know how to describe it. And it was weird because John is the exact opposite of anyone I'd ever dated (every other guy I dated was either black or a long-haired, leather jacket-wearing stoner). I tried to ignore those feelings in my belly for a while, but I just couldn't. So I told Shawn about John and broke up with him. Crazy how life works out sometimes.

But anyway, yes, I agree that it's more likely to hit you over the head when you least expect it. But I also think it's really easy for us to say that, being married and/or in long-time relationships. I would imagine if I were single I'd be looking for it, too. Either that or I'd still be cruising 'hoods with my cousin, sleeping with every rough neck nigga I could find, LOL. Or living in a trailer park with a husband who smokes his daily joint in front of our kids. *sigh*.

Could I be just a *little* chattier today?

Renee said...

Um, I'm hoping everyone knows I was paraphrasing Adina Howard and not using the N word in a deragatory way. I guess one could argue that it being used at ALL is deragatory, but I certainly didn't mean it that way and the only time I use that word is when I'm singing along with some Snoop or Dre. Or Adina Howard, in this case.

Nik said...

Renee-- even if I were single and had been for some time, I wouldn't put so much weight into whether or not I was with someone or not. Happiness can be found on one's own. If I were to spend the rest of my life being single, I can honestly say that I'd be totally cool with it. You bring up some very valid points, though. Especially the part about "ruff neck niggas" and the ensuing explanation. hehehehe

Jen said...

i'd like to say i'd be totally fine being single the rest of my life, but i wouldnt. i'd WANT kids and marriage and (no offense) a family of my own so i'm not the spinster, childless aunt going to katey's for thanksgiving when i'm 50. You know? that's just not what i want.

Anna said...

I truly believe it will happen for you, Jen.
You're spending valuable time getting yourself together - your health, the bi-p, the job, school, your life goals. I know it sounds cheesey but it's only when you love yourself and realize your own worth that others can love you in the way you deserve.

Renee said...

Jen, I'm with you. I'd like to SAY I'd be happy if I were single forever, but I'm not so sure I would be. I'm not saying I'd be depressed and hate myself, I just think I'd feel like something were missing from my life. I can't imagine not having John and Brent in my life and being okay with it.

I also agree 100% with what Anna said. You're doing so many great things in your life right now and I think everything will fall into place. Even so, what happened to the attitude you had a few months ago about being almost proud of being single because you know you're not settling for an ass hole, etc?

Jen said...

I AM proud of myself for not settling. However, I'd also like to know where my NON asshole is. =-)

Nik said...

Jen- I wasn't trying to say that you should be cool with being alone for the rest of your life or anything (because I am) in my response to Renee. I hope you didn't take it that way.

I do think you should definately listen to wise Anna though. Cheesey or not, I totally agree with her.

Anna said...

I am actually laughing out loud in my cube at work at the picture of Jen searching for her non-asshole. In my head she's standing naked in front of a mirror patting down different parts of her body, saying "No, not here, or here, hmm, now where is it?"
I guess it's a day dreamy Friday. Happy Friday Everyone!!!